It's a nice walk home that I don't do nearly as often as I should, and I have the current laboured breathing to show for it.
I was committed when I first sat down in the office. I was committed while I was eating my low-fat breakfast yoghurt.
I was committed when I felt like a snack at morning tea time, and I was committed when I remembered that I only had celery sticks and bravely decided to go without.
I was committed when I sat down to lunch and grimly chewed my way through konjac noodles and tried to pretend they were pasta, the same way the company that sold them to me had.
I was committed to it when I decided I deserved a Coke Zero and found to my horror that the machine still hadn't been refilled since it mysteriously emptied out on Friday and I had to settle for a Diet Coke instead.
I was committed to it while I was walking to the door of the office...
And then someone said, "It's hot out there. You won't need your cardigan."
I don't understand where commitment goes. Perhaps it overheated and decided to go off somewhere and sit in the shade.
I caught the bus, but then for some reason my commitment came back.
Half an hour from home it jumped back in control and demanded that I leave the bus right then and there. I tried to explain to it how that would be totally impolite to the driver who'd steered us so well up to that point, but eventually I gave in and jumped down at the next stop.
The reason the someone said about the heat was because it was very hot outside. Even without my cardigan. 31 degree heat, and I was a half hour from home. I managed the walk, but I still haven't cooled down. I decided not to heat my tea in the microwave in favour of eating it cold straight from the refrigerator.
I'm not sure that I'm committed to this tomorrow. We'll see.
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