If, perchance, I've signed up to your email list in the past, please do not be offended if you receive an unsubscribe request from me this week.
I am trying to save money.
I have also discovered that the "willpower" others claim to possess is not on sale anywhere at the moment, so I don't have any.
The reason that I signed up for your emails is because I like the things you have to sell. In the past this has meant that I wanted to see everything you had to offer.
Unfortunately, this now proves to be too much of a temptation and the self-denial I've recently indulged in doesn't seem to be performing the task of making me feel smug and superior as was claimed on the box.
Therefore, please treat it as a compliment when I ask to unsubscribe from your emails this week.
If in the future I find myself sufficiently endowed, I promise to pay you a visit.